lyrics by Jackson Dawes

Here are a few meaningless phrases that I have compiled to throw into discussions These just completely muddy the water and/or make you sound smarter Number 1. "That's just semantics" Number 2, and I love this one. "That is a symptom of the overall problem, not a root cause" Number 3. "Yeah, and you see how Sartre or Kierkegaard or Lenin wound up" Number 4. "You're just splitting hairs here" Number 5. "Of course it was rhetorical" Completely meaningless The following are all true but are guaranteed to alienate people and start arguments For example "Right, but if the Ukrainians were black, nobody would care" and "What you and I think of as capitalism is predatory capitalism And the to the business world, capitalism means nanny-state socialism" and also "Think of how stupid the average person is And then realize that exactly half of the planet is even more stupid" and "You're not basing your opinions on fact you're looking for facts to justify your baseless opinions" don't forget "Your grandkids are going to need a snorkel to visit Miami when they're your age Is your Instagram account really that important in the grand scheme of things? "When an individual blames others for things that he or she does themselves, that's human nature When a society does that, it's called foreign relations And most importantly "Most people don't care about most things and most other people" Save these for Thanksgiving! You'll thank me! You'll thank me