lyrics by Jackson Dawes

I've been staying up way too late and getting up early is just impossible A forty pound 3-year old using your chest as a trampoline at 7:30 AM helps but some mornings I even sleep through that let's go! Once upon a time I could go out drinking get in at 5 and go to work at 7:30 but alas those days are long gone And forget about an all-nighter I'd be puking in my coffee by 9 AM I do try to get to bed at a sensible time. Unfortunately, sometimes you need a serious boost to keep from dragging ass all day Here's a tip to chase away those morning blahs yeah! Don't do this without consulting a doctor first: Get out of bed and do ten or fifteen jumping jacks to get the blood flowing and to clear your head Next, take about 150 cc of synthetic ephylphetamine it's expensive but not too hard to get try online military supply stores overseas and don't use your real name I prefer to inject high up on the thigh but do what works for you. Do not inject within 12 inches of the base of your spinal cord or you'll never have to worry about waking up again Next, inject approximately 30 cc of digitaxin just to to keep the heart steady If you do encounter any cardiac arrhythmia during the day make sure you have potassium tablets. Keep it slow and steady. Now I'm not going to claim this is a perfect solution I'd love to get 8 hours of sleep every night But on those not-so-rare occasions like today where you need a serious pick-me-up this is the way to do it. Peace